Time to Think

This blog is officially public now; it was never actually meant to be. Part of me feels completely exposed, while part of me feels like it's just who I am, so why hide it?

Anyways, what I really wanted to talk about today is kinda serious. When you're home sick, you have a lot of time to think. And when you're alone, thinking about life, it's not always positive. Even with my best friends reaching out with compassion and love, even surrounded by family who is concerned about me, I just felt a bit empty. I think it's a hole that is meant to be there, a feeling that keeps us from ever being satisfied by anything or anyone on this earth.

In all honesty, I've been falling from grace lately, consumed by stress and anxiety. My former coach, teacher and friend passed away from cancer, my cousin is excused from the doctors after being diagnosed with swelling in her brain and spine, one of my dear friends moved back to her village in Africa just to find her husband and mother have passed away in the time she visited here, and I'm supposed to take care in these things and find peace? I'm losing people faster than I can say goodbye, and part of me is leaving with them.
Jeremiah 23:23 says, "I am a God who is near. I am also a God who is far away," declares the LORD. Whether or not we feel Him moving in our lives, we can be assured that He is with us at all times. I know that He is the only one who I do not mourn when I can no longer see Him; He is the only one who will stay with us until the end.